see through skirts

These are not really see through, they just have a picture on them to make it seem as though they are. Clever idea, but l can't say l like them.

toodle pip

rolling stones bootlegs

As a follow up to the Beach Boys bootlegs l posted earlier, here's The Rolling Stones ones. I have more Stones stuff, these are just the bootlegs . The top picture looks like the normal albums, but these are my illegal Russian ones, all with extra out-takes etc on them. Of course l have them all as normal albums as well (which sad git wouldn't?).

The Beatles ones will be next.

I need to get out more.

toodle pip

london map from 1845

This is fantastic. London has certainly changed a lot since then.

This is from :

http://www.ianvisits.co.uk/blog/2010/08/11/huge-panorama-of-london-in-1845/

toodle pip

nirvana and the jacksons - go home productions

Out today by Go Home Productions (Mark Vidler). Class

toodle pip

beach boys bootlegs

As l am such a sad bastard, l have been sorting through some of my bootlegs today, just to confirm how pathetic l am. These are some of the Beach Boys ones. If that seems a bit over the top, wait till l show the Beatles and Rolling Stones ones.

toodle pip

steve mcqueen's hunger with michael fassenbender

I was a bit unsure about this film beforehand, in case it just glorified Bobby Sands and the hunger strikers, just putting across that they were all heroes and the English are all bastards, but it didn't. The English still didn't come out of it very well, mainly because they were represented by the Tory government at that time and Margaret (milk snatcher) Thatcher. It did however, show some of the guards in the Maze prison to be human, without pulling back from the violence inflicted on the prisoners.

This is another superb film where the actor loses weight (in this case about 3 stone in 10 weeks) to play the part convincingly. Michael Fassenbender (Bobby Sands) is the actor in question, and is superb throughout. He has a zealous look about him during the first part of the film, and is totally convincing when he loses his weight (when Bobby is on the hunger strike). I do wonder if this may go too far one day, with actors competitiveness taking over, and them trying to outdo one another, may result in permanent damage (just as people trying to outdo Jackass will eventually (if they haven't already) end up killing themselves).

The film is very realistic and portrays what it must have been like in the Maze at the time, so much so in fact, I had flashbacks to my own dirty protest in Durham prison in the 1980's. There is also a great scene where Bobby talks to the priest (Father Dominic Moran, played by Liam Cunningham), which has one very long uninterrupted shot of them speaking to one another. That must have taken one hell of a lot of remembering and it is very impressive.

Another film well worth watching (just don't be eating something at the same time).

toodle pip

milk

Watched this yesterday and it was excellent. Shaun Penn plays Harvey Milk, a gay rights activist who eventually gets murdered. Penn lost weight for the role and plays him just right, stubborn, brave, and a bit camp. Apparently Milk was more hot tempered in real life and would fly into rages, but this doesn't alter the fact that this is a really well made film. l put off watching it for ages as l always have other stuff to do, but it was well worth viewing. Shaun Penn has certainly matured, l used to think he was crap when he was younger, but he has certainly developed into a fine actor.

l have just double checked and found that Penn won the best actor Oscar for the film, and the film itself won the best movie Oscar. A good choice.

toodle pip

dodgy richmond live

Dodgy closing the show

Forgot to post the other day that Richmond Live was at the weekend so the FPO and l went down there on Saturday evening, leaving it later than usual because it was raining during the afternoon, and being an old bastard, l didn't want to get soaked and muddy.

I was already a bit tidly when l got there, so when there were volunteers asked for to do some poetry, l was straight up there. l had decided what l was going to say, but when l got to the mike, l foolishly made something up on the spot, which contained swearing. Didn't get a great response from Rapping Ritchie (who gave me the mike), as there were children present. Never mind, punk rock and all that. I also nearly got in a fight with a young lad who was bugging a hippie couple, as l told him to fuck off and leave them alone. His response was "l am only 16, would you hit a kid", to which l replied "Yes l would, l would punch you right in your face". His mates dragged him away when l advised them to do so before he got hurt (luckily for me as l am a soft bastard). He will probably come looking for me when he is in his 20's, so if l get assassinated, it's probably him.

The usual bands were on again (Atlantic Soul Messengers, Jism, The Exploding Buddahs), and the main band were Dodgy, who we didn't think a lot of, so we decided to bugger off early to get a taxi to JT's. can't remember what time we left there, but it was a bugger getting out of bed on Sunday morning, as l went to work.

It was the worst one music wise l have been to (and l have been to them all). They could definitely do with some fresh faces.

toodle pip

day care for men

A great idea for when the FPO wants to go out shopping (or whatever it is that they do).

toodle pip

upside down picture

It looks good and it makes you think, which can't be a bad thing.

toodle pip

loneliness of the long distance runner - girl with the green eyes - lolita

I didn't go to bed until about 4.30am last night, and surprisingly, l was awake again at about 9.30am this morning (even after the FPO had woken me up earlier in the morning), so l read the Sunday paper to catch up on news and got up and watched some films (it's a hard life).

The Loneliness of the Long Distance Runner is from 1962 and stars Tom Courteney as Colin Smith, the anti hero. He gets arrested and put into a borstal, where they discover he is the best long distance runner, so the governor starts to trust him and give him more freedom, in the hope he will win the challenge race against the public school boys. Ultimately, Colin hates the establishment, and although everyone thinks that he has become the governor's pet, he throws the race right at the end, sacrificing glory and a possible early release, to demonstrate that it is all meaningless and he rejects society's values. It is an excellent film (based on the also excellent 1959 book by Alan Sillitoe). Although it is pretty dated, (with a young James Bolam and a supposedly Liverpudlian John Thaw), it is up there as one of my favourite films.

The Girl With The Green Eyes (1964) stars Rita Tushingham as Kate Brady, an innocent farm girl who moves to Dublin and shares a place with her best friend Baba Brennan, who both fall for a middle aged married writer, but he ends up falling for Kate. Also very dated but not too good, didn't manage to watch it till the end, as l got bored after about an hour. I was curious about the film as it is by Edna O'Brien, and l am reading her 'A Pagan Place' (amongst other things) at the moment. Mind you, l may give up on that as well, as it's not exactly gripping.

Talking of gripping (what a link!), that's what Jeremy Irons (as Humbert Humbert) was doing to his stepdaughter in the 1997 remake of Vladimir Nobokov's Lolita. I have read the book and seen the earlier (1962) film by Stanley Kubrick (starring James Mason), but l still managed to forget some of the plot. When Humbert is driving away at the start with a gun and blood on him, l assumed he had killed the stepdaughters husband, but it was his doppelgänger Clare Quilty. My memory is rubbish. I also forgot the reason Humbert gives for falling in love with a child (his childhood sweetheart dies young, and he had been looking for a replacement ever since). I do however, remember the book being darker, and Humbert being a lot crueller. Also in the book, Lolita is 12, but seems to be slightly older in this film. There was a lot of controversy before this film was released, and l do think it romanticises the relationship too much, but they both die at the end, so the moralists should have been kept happy and cut down on their complaining. I still prefer the James Mason version (also starring Peter Sellers!), and may even get round to reading the book again one of these days.

Right, off for a coffee.

toodle pip

another stupid tattoo

Why oh why was this done? Crappy and scary at the same time, but l suppose it will annoy her parents, so there's something worthwhile about it.

toodle pip

national geographic animal pictures

Common Carp

Cownose Ray

Longnose Skate

Better than the pictures l take of our stinking animals

toodle pip

assessor training finished

I have been in Darlington today for some assessor training at Morton Park. Heather gave me a lift in, but l then had to hang around afterwards as she needed to go back to the Darlington office to finish something off on their computer. Damn! l never thought that one through. Still, l was back by 5.30pm and am now off. l have sent some emails for work this evening, and have to make a couple of phone calls tomorrow (today in fact, as it is already Wednesday), then my work phone will be switched off till Friday evening, and my feet will be up on the settee.

As l am off, l am immediately back to staying up late, reading and listening to stuff. My, it's good. About time that bloody lottery paid up so l can retire.

toodle pip

nathan barley - bunch of lemons

This is obviously based on Banksie's work, but it is still excellent. It was put up to advertise the Nathan Barley series a year or so ago (l think it was broadcast then, but l can't be bothered looking it up). Clever idea.

Look out for rabbits pretty soon, that's what l say.

toodle pip

nearly off for the week

Finished work today, and that's about it for the week. I have got training tomorrow, then I am off until 9pm on Friday night. Marvellous stuff, and l am going to make the most of it by doing bugger all (no change there then). All I need now is some sunny weather to go with the time off.

toodle pip

football is back!

At long last, the season has nearly started again. It may have been a World Cup year, but as usual, England were crap and it is nothing like as exciting as watching the glorious United. I watched the 3-1 win over Chelsea at work today, as l was by myself from 2pm till 6pm, so that worked out pretty damn good. All hail little Scholes, man of the match with a brilliant passing display. It's a shame he can't play forever.

Newcastle next week - bring it on!

toodle pip

reykjavik mayor jon gnarr

This is the sort of politician we should have in the UK. The mayor of Reykjavik, Jon Gnarr opened up their Gay Pride festival dressed as his buxom alter ego, and then slagged off the mayor (himself) for not attending.

When Jon Gnarr came to power, he did so by promising free towels in swimming pools and a Polar bear in the zoo (he is a comedian). He also wants a Disneyland at the airport and "A drug free parliament" by 2020.

The prime minister of Iceland, Johanna Stigurdardottir, is also openly gay. How come we get lumbered with the likes of Boris Johnson, Nick Cegg and David Cameron? (Tory bastards)

I would go and live over there if it wasn't for the freezing conditions and the price of alcohol.

The UK has a lot of catching up to do.

toodle pip

dodgy tattoo

What the fuck was this simpleton of a girl thinking of when she had this tattoo done? Babies l guess, but this is just ridiculous. Women eh?

toodle pip

yogi bear in 3d

Now it can't just be me. This poster is well dodgy (as we say on the streets).

toodle pip

the troggs tapes

The Troggs Tapes from towersopenfire on Vimeo.

This is classic stuff. Takes me back to when l used to be in Lilac Mist

toodle pip

bloody rats

We still have rats annoying little (or not so little) Tubbs outside. I have seen two large ones and a couple of baby ones, which all come out looking for food after Tubbs gets his grub and is then locked away for the night. Sods. I think it's time for me to build an elaborate trap for them. Watch this space for further developments.

toodle pip

bring on the work!

Another epic shift has just finished at 9pm tonight, and l am going back into work tomorrow at 8am and struggling on until until 9pm again. Have managed to sort out a lot while l have been in, and sent away for everyone's references, whether they like it or not. Also done some meet and greets, so now it's just the matter of getting the CRB checks done. By that time, l will be in Turkey, so it will be someone else's problem starting everyone.

The bad thing about today was that l had just organised some Fire training and a team meeting, then l received an email saying l had to go on a training course. No problem there, apart from the fact the course falls on the same day as the other stuff, so l will have to re-arrange them.

At least l have (l think) cracked all the wages and associated forms. Guess everyone will find out at the end of the month when they don't get paid. As long as mine are there, that's all that matters to me.

As usual, l should really have an early night to prepare for tomorrow, especially as l have been awake since about 5am, as l woke up and couldn't get back to sleep, so l listened to my ipod instead. Fat chance of that happening though. I have just had a bath (hurrah!) and have to wait for my hair to dry, so that will take some time (obviously l do not use a hair dryer). I am going for the unbrushed look tomorrow, not that anyone will notice any difference, as l am a scruffy bugger at the best of times.

Right, that's it, l'm off onto t'internet to look at stupid stuff.

toodle pip

optical illusions

Once again, very clever indeed

toodle pip

relaxing before the big push

I am off work till 3pm today, and they have just phoned to say they will pick me up and bring me in (they must be desperate). I am however, probably going to be working long shifts on Thursday and Friday, I reckon between 8am and 9pm. At this rate I will be rolling in money at the end of September. I did send off for peoples references yesterday though, as we have recruited some more staff, and I want to get the process moving along as quickly as possible, so they can get started ASAP. Sadly, we also have to wait for their CRB checks to come through before they can start, and then they will have to do an induction. At least there is some light at the end of the tunnel, and everyone should be back from their holidays soon (apart from me!). Also going to sort out a work holiday (Turkey or Spain?) this week, so that will get me away again in September. Hurrah! Not long to go now.....

toodle pip

more illusion art

I like the second one of these the best - didn't see the skull at first, but once you do, it's obvious.

toodle pip

illusion art

I like this sort of stuff a lot, ever since getting into Salvador Dali's stuff when l was younger. Very clever indeed

toodle pip

richmond and pub

I had to go into Richmond this morning (on my day off!) for a meet and greet with someone who is thinking about moving into a home in Richmond. Went back to the Richmond office afterwards, but then managed to escape and go for a quick pint in the Unicorn, where l relaxed and listened to my ipod, as it was pretty empty (and l am a miserable unsociable bastard). Left Richmond at about 2.45pm and got a taxi to the Wine Bar, where l met up with Joe (plus Dave the health and safety man, Ritchie, Pat etc) for the usual crap. The FPO was meant to be picking up the car from the garage, but it turns out it needs extra work doing to it, as she had put oil in the steering fluid, so it's messed up the engine (or brakes or whatever). The brake pads need changing anyway, so we are careless at the moment. She came to meet me in the Wine Bar, so we had a quick one there (ooer), went to JT's for a quick one (ooer again), and then home. It's not too bad for me having no car, as l can cycle to work, but we definitely need one for her. Bloody things.

toodle pip

vivian stanshall - stinkfoot

I don't really know anything about this, but I do think the poster for it is excellent.

toodle pip

dodgy t shirts

toodle pip

stewart lee and his shelves

Some of my CD's

Stewart Lee with his stuff

In todays Observer magazine there was an article by Stewart Lee, about his need for shelves to store all his records, books and comics. It involved other stuff as well, but the main thing l was thinking was "It looks great, and l wish l had loads more possessions to put on my shelves". I know l can easily go either way. I really love records, comics, films and books, so I will either end up with too much stuff all over the place (like Stewart Lee), or cut down and get minimalistic in the future, once l have purchased a top of the range computer of the space age, with ultra fast broadband and everything available on the net (mainly for free). The only trouble with the minimalistic approach, is it is so fulfilling to actually touch the objects and know they belong to a certain part of pop culture history (or history in general). That's why l want an original copy of Amazing fantasy no 15, rather than a brand new and ultra glossy reprint. I do know that if l became super rich l would have a large house full of junk l would have collected and accumulated on my travels, but living in the real world (sadly), l may flog off all my tat before l die (if l time it right), so l can fund something along the lines of a trip to Japan (with all the trimmings). It's about time the bleeding lottery selected me as a winner. I blame the new government. Rich bastards.

toodle pip

a damp squid

I always thought that is what the quote was until watching the IT crowd on Friday night. Apparently I was wrong. Here are the top ten misquoted phrases

1) A damp squid (a damp squib)

2) On tender hooks (on tenter hooks)

3) Nip it in the butt (nip it in the bud)

4) Champing at the bit (chomping at the bit)

5) A mute point (a moot point)

6) One foul swoop (one fell swoop)

7) All that glitters is not gold (all that glisters is not gold)

8) Adverse to (averse to)

9) Batting down the hatches (batten down the hatches)

10) Find a penny pick it up (find a pin pick it up)

Damn the English language

toodle pip

caravan site

Myself and the FPO are going caravanning in a couple of weeks (OK, spending one night in a caravan with Robbo and Kerry). Therefore we went to check it out today. It's on the outskirts of Richmond and belongs to the FPO's family. Pretty much all the family were there today, and we had lunch with them all, even though my hay fever was bugging me and l had a red face, as l had just got out of a red hot bath before setting off. I may have to go skinny dipping in the Swale when we are there, so l hope the neighbours have some heavy duty curtains to block out the sight. Don't say they haven't been warned.

toodle pip