the david heaton resignation

Once again, something in the news seems to make no sense to me, and appears to be so obviously wrong. According to the BBC website, David Heaton, (a tax advisor) was secretly filmed in a sting giving advice on how to avoid paying tax.  It seems he knows what he is talking about, as members of the audience had paid £1,000 each for the knowledge.
Two months later, he was subsequently hired by the government to advise HM Revenue and Customs on tax avoidance, but because of the Panorama / Private Eye sting, has resigned.
Now there are two ways of looking at this. If  he already worked for the government beforehand (I can't be bothered checking), he was caught bang to rights, and should have been sacked, not given the option to resign.
On the other hand, if he didn't work for them, and was explaining how to exploit loopholes (which, lets face it, most rich people do anyway), then he would be an ideal person to advise HMRC, rather like getting an ex burglar to advise on house security, as he obviously knows how to look for tax avoidance schemes.
If anything, the sting proves his past makes him more ideal for the job, as he knows what he is on about.
Either way, the poor will still pay a larger percent of their income to the taxman, while the rich will hire accountants to prevent them wasting their money on such naive altruistic concepts.
Cynical? Me?
Pah!

toodle pip

compassionate conservatism - now it's the post office

Next up, the Post Office is to be sold off.
Nothing surprises me any more.  There will be bugger all left to sell soon, but by then the pockets will be full, their friends taken care of, the troughs will have been emptied, and they will (hopefully) be booted out of power. Not that it will bother most of them too much, as they would have set themselves up in high paid advisory roles with their buddies firms. You scratch my back, l'll scratch yours.
Bastards.

toodle pip

heart screenings available

I don't know if they are just targeting me, or if everybody is getting sent them, but l got this leaflet through the door the other day, offering heart screenings in a nearby village.
Cheeky sods, l'm indestructible now, plus l noticed it was about £150 to get screened.
I'd rather keel over dead than hand my money over to these scaremongers gits (possibly my famous last words!).

Nearly forgot - On a related note, l always assumed that when someone has a heart attack as a result of a blocked artery, all the arteries were cleaned and opened out afterwards, but it turns out they have an emergency angiogram and then only  stent the affected one.  Now to a common everyday idiot like me,that makes no sense.  After all, if a persons lifestyle has caused the artery to become blocked, surely all of them will also be at some stage of being narrowed, so to me, it would make sense to check and sort them out as well.
It turns out, what seems so bleeding obvious is now being implemented after recent tests at The Golden Jubilee National Hospital, which were actually halted before completion as the results were so overwhelmingly one sided and positive.  Prof Colin Berry, heart specialist at the Golden Jubilee and the University of Glasgow, said: "They were some of the most striking results for a treatment that I have ever seen. The results of this trial really challenge clinical practice.".
Obviously the treatment would cost more, but in the long term it would surely be cost effective, as the hospitals would only have to deal with later problems anyway. Naturally some heart specialists want longer tests, but they are all blithering idiots (or may have a hidden agenda)
I'm still amazed it wasn't performed as a regular procedure in the past, and as l have always said (to the annoyance of everybody, l should be in charge of everything.  Street wise and intelligent - what a lethal combination!

toodle pip

voyager 1 has buggered off and left us

So, NASA have agreed that Voyager 1 has now gone and entered interstellar space, which is an amazing accomplishment when you think that it was built using 1960's and 70's technology.
The above photograph was taken by Voyager in 1990, and it shows the Earth, a long way in the distance. Since then, we are a lot further away, and in another 40,000 years Voyager will be closer to star AC+79 3888 than our own sun (and the star is heading towards us faster than we are going towards it!). To state that space is vast is somewhat of an understatement.

toodle pip

extremely loud and incredibly close - jonathan safran foer and the falling man of 9/11

I got into reading 'Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close' (by Jonathan Safran Foer) just before Channel 4 started showing films and documentaries about 9/11, and didn't realise when l started reading it, that there was any connection to the destruction of The World Trade Centre (but there is).
A young boys father has been killed (guess where and how), and the boy (Oskar Scell) then finds a key that his father had hidden in a vase, and wonders what it will open. As the envelope it was contained in had the word 'Black' written on it, he assumes that must be someone who his father knew, so goes out on a long, long search around New York to try and find them. I really enjoyed the book, as it kept you absorbed and guessing, so I won't give the outcome away, but at the end of the book there are numerous pictures of a man falling from the twin towers, which coincidentally led on nicely to 'The Falling Man' documentary which was broadcast just as l finished the book.

That concerned the identity of the falling man that was originally shown in 'The Morning Call' newspaper in the States, but subsequently seen all around the world.  There were viewpoints on whether the photograph should have been printed, and there was a (you would imagine) impossible search to try and find out who the man was. However, once a couple of suspects had been mooted and family and friends questioned, there was also the consequences of the harm and hurt the families might suffer if the mans identity was confirmed which had to be taken into consideration.  Maybe it is better for all involved not to know, and have him represent other victims, the way that 'The Unknown Soldier' does.  Of course there was the dilemma that some family members who were Catholic and did not want to think their relative had committed suicide, as that was a sin and their soul would 'Go to Hell', which puts another slant on the need to identify the jumper. In the end, the identity was left open, despite some decent evidence, and that was probably for the best.
It must have taken some nerve to jump, but l would rather have done that myself than staying in the building and burning.

As a sidenote, one of the adverts inbetween the programme started with 'Jump into a world of choice...'
How ironic.

toodle pip

the simpsons say no to drugs

Seeing this poster on drugs would be enough to put you off them for life. It would certainly freak me out. Apparently this is in a Chinese nightclub.

toodle pip

more new books

It's a good job l am off work at the moment, as these are a few of the books l want to try and get through. They are a mixture of charity shop buys in the top picture, and birthday presents in the second.
I suppose it keeps me out of mischief.

toodle pip

the strypes - snapshot and wilko johnson dealing with death

This has been on steady rotation throughout the day, and l think it's great!   The Strypes new album (in old money) called 'Snapshot', which is short in length but full of energy and attitude. They certainly copy their influences, but their music, clothes and presentation is spot on.  I wouldn't go as far to say they have the same aggressive attitude as Dr Feelgood (who they sound like the most), but they obviously have time to develop, and Wilko Johnson and John B Sparks (from Dr Feelgood) certainly support them.

This sort of stuff makes me want to be 17 again.  I hope they don't blow it.

Here's The Strypes with Wilko and Sparky (as l call him), doing the Feelgoods 'She Does It Right'.



Here's the Feelgoods doing the original  



And here's Wilko talking about his terminal cancer on Breakfast TV.  I'd like to think l would react the same way to the news of my impending death as he has with his own.  What a genius guitarist and a fine example of a man.  See (or buy) Oil City Confidential for more affirmation.



toodle pip

the daily mirror action replay flick books

When l was a young whipper snapper we didn't have any computers or video machines, we had to contend ourselves with Daily Mirror Goal Action Replay football flick books, which came out in about 1972/73, and repeated famous goals when the pages were flicked through at a steady (but reasonably fast) rate.
Ah, those lovely innocent days of my youth.
I've just retried the George Best one and a couple of others, and they all work just the same as they did back in the day. Sod new formats, this was ingenious!!
Try goggling flick books nowadays, and l bet the results will make your eyes water.

toodle pip

the jenni sparks new york map

I was looking at some maps the other day with a view to framing a couple (probably of Manhattan and London), and was reminded of this little beauty by Jenni Sparks.  It's a hand drawn map of Manhattan and can be bought from here.  It's very cleverly done, and it looks great, but l might just go with the normal kind of maps so they both match (I'm sure l might be autistic!).
Then again, l might easily change my mind tomorrow (I'm that kind of guy).

toodle pip

michael jackson and alfred e newman in mad magazine

What a great and prophetic cover this was. Michael Jackson and Alfred E Newman on the cover of Mad magazine

toodle pip

arguing about napoleon (and then the masons)

Napoleon Boneparte with his arm in his waistcoat

I was round at Joe's place earlier today, and we ended up having a discussion / argument about Napoleon Bonaparte (as you do).
Why was Napoleon's arm always in his waistcoat in paintings (and what was wrong with it?)  Did he fight at Trafalgar or Waterloo?  Did he die at Elba or St Helena?  What did he die of, poisoning or ill health?
See what happens when two idiots with only a faint grasp of history get together? I wouldn't mind so much, but we weren't even drinking!!
Anyway, although Joes arguments had me doubting myself, he was exiled at both Elba (where he escaped from) and latterly, St Helena (where he died).  He fought at both Trafalgar and Waterloo (in that order), and died of stomach cancer (like his father), although there were high levels of arsenic found in his body (but this was not due to the wallpaper).
As for his arm, it was in the waistcoat as either a fashion of the times, or it was to do with the Freemasons, and a sign of masonic rituals and membership, whichever you wish to believe (see photos below). It also had nothing to do with painters charging by the limb ('an arm and a leg' expression)
I'm glad to say l was correct with all my statements, and Joe is an idiot.

 George Washington

 Joseph (Uncle Joe) Stalin

 Karl Marx

 Marquis de Lafayette

 Simon Bolivar

 Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart

Some Masonic information

Some more Masonic information

And even more Masonic information and the invaluable source for the above photographs can be found here.
Don't trust anything or anybody!! (and don't get me started on The Illuminati and the New World Order!)

toodle pip

clockwork orange lobby cards

More crap that l would like to have framed.  Lobby cards from the film of  'A Clockwork Orange', one of my favourite films of all time (which would explain a lot). Viddy well brothers and sisters.

toodle pip

horse on the way to the pub

The joys of living in the countryside.  Stopping to stroke a horse on the way to the pub.
Then again, it drives me crazy (or crazier) the amount of horses on the road that l have to slow down for (obviously when l am driving a car, l don't walk that fast).

toodle pip

5 guys meeting up over 30 years for a photograph

This is the kind of thing l can appreciate.  Five guys have been meeting up at Copco Lake, California, and re-enacting the same photograph of themselves every 5 years over the last 30 years.  A splendid idea, and the dedication to such a task leaves me suitably impressed.
From here.

toodle pip

another night out in the boro

Mmmmmm   a new Indian we hadn't used before

Instructions for Kerry's injections

The joys of having Mr C - the house is a playroom

Went off again to Middlesbrough yesterday evening to see Robbo and Kerry (and Mr C!) as a kind of joint birthday do for me and Robbo.  There were a couple of disasters beforehand, as Robbo had to take Kerry to a private hospital for some cortisone injections in her back (she's now knocking on a bit), there was also some drama in the Boro with people that we are all close to that l won't go into, and l had to turn around half way towards their house as there had been some kind of a crash and the road was shut down.  We only had a quiet night anyway, with myself and Robbo heading to the Rudds in Marton (for the first time), getting some food from the Jolsha Indian Restaurant at Marton Square (also for the first time), and then returning to Nunthorpe to talk shite until Robbo fell asleep (not for the first time, and he's also knocking on).  I was impressed with the Ruds pub and the indian food (despite them forgetting a dish), but less impressed with the ageing process. Luckily l am now invincible and indestructible, and still look 21 (after many ales have been taken).

Nearly forgot, l bought Robbo an excellent book about Steve Ditko, which l managed to leave alone and not read beforehand prior to handing it over. Believe me, that took strength of character.  I'll have to nick it from him in the future when he is not paying attention.

toodle pip

richmond live 2013 - my brother is lost

A photograph of Richmond Live 2013 (not taken by me) that features my brother wandering around with his pint, as we all lost each other within a short time of arrival, due to chatting to people and getting sidetracked (drink may also have played its part).
I bumped into him again shortly afterwards, despite hiding behind some bushes for half an hour or so.
He's hard to shake off.

toodle pip