mishap on the train

Damn!  This is what happens when you fall asleep on the train back from Newcastle - you end up at desolate Northallerton railway station and have to change trains and head back up to Darlington so you can drive home.
I was fast asleep when someone sat next to me, which woke me up.  It's a good job they did, as l would have ended up in that there London.  The train was actually in Darlingon station when l woke up, but by the time l'd grabbed my bag and ipod, the train had set off again, with me muttering curses and profanities under my breath at the firmly closed door.
I knew l was tired, but not that much. They're working me into the ground, but I suppose l should be grateful l wasn't covered in drool, and l hadn't wet myself while l was sleeping.  That would have been just a teesie bit more embarrassing, but l'm sure l will eventually end up doing that as well, it's only a matter of time, as my senility takes over and l finally lose what is left of my marbles.

toodle pip

michael smiths small town america

 

These shots of small time America from back in the day look really realistic, but they are from a project called 'Elgin Park' by Michael Paul Smith, who has been photographing small models and scenery that he has built, using real landscapes as backgrounds, with splendid results.
The photographs are available to buy, and there are more photographs, plus more about the project (and shots of the photographs being set up), at his site, which can be found here.
I always have a grudging respect for anyone who is devoted enough to follow their artistic bent to such a degree, but this must take up a hell of a lot of his time.
I wonder if he is married?

toodle pip

the budget

I thought the top poster was a spoof at first, but no, of course not, nothing is too patronising for the piss taking bastards, and it's just a shame that so many of the poor and uneducated will fall for it.
The bottom one is a spoof, but is a lot more honest.
Sadly, l can't envisage Ed Miliband winning a general election in the near (or distant) future, so it looks like we are stuck with Gideon (the 'destroyer') and his toffs.
Eat the rich brothers and sisters - time for a revolution!!

toodle pip

lucky (or unlucky) cyclist

I can't decide if this is really lucky or unlucky.
A cyclist is hit by a pickup truck, and as it hits him, a mattress falls off the back of the truck, which the cyclist then lands on, cushioning his fall.
Now what are the chances of that happening??
If l was him, l'd go and buy a lottery ticket, but then again, he may get run over on the way to the shop.
He's living life on a knifes edge.

toodle pip

training at newcastle

Damn!!!  I'm certainly not used to this.
Having to drag myself out of bed at silly o'clock so l can drive to Darlington and catch an early train to Newcastle each day, because l have got six days of training at the University, and have to be there for just after 9am.
I'm used to lying around in bed in the mornings, not this kind of nonsense!
I know most people live in the real world and have to get up early five days a week, but that is exactly what l have been trying to avoid for god knows how many years.  Luckily for me, the training is spread out over a couple of weeks, so l've got three earlies this week, two next week, and then a final day on the following Monday.
It also involves looking at computer screens most of the day, and much as l love computers, it's too much for my tired eyes when l am meant to still be in bed.
Still........Two days just completed, not back there till Friday, so it's back to late nights and lie ins till then (and l'll be watching the 'glorious' Manchester United tomorrow night).
Hurrah!!!!

toodle pip

craig tracy painting

Craig Tracy paintings can certainly deceive the eye.  This one is one of his best.
His site is here.

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oscar attendees with their younger selves

Ever wondered what it would be like if the people attending the Oscar ceremony could go with their younger selves?
Well wonder no more, and there are a few more here.

toodle pip

huge spider found in rucksack

This is a picture of the rather large 'and feisty' huntsman spider that charity worker Nora Serrat has just found in her rucksack after she had returned from a two week trip to Cameroon on behalf of The Rainforest Foundation UK.
This is exactly why l am not too keen to travel to places that may have huge spiders lurking about, ready to pounce on me at the earliest opportunity. It's bad enough in England, let alone in a bleeding rainforest.
I think my old ticker would have exploded with fear if l had found this in my rucksack.
Evil scary bastards - all of them.

toodle pip

alexa mead paintings

Alexa Mead paints people to look like they are in fact, paintings.  And it's very effective.
From here

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president putin butt plug

A President Putin butt plug!!
Available to buy here.
Genius!

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a five year olds forgery

A five year old tries to fake her mothers signature - but not very successfully.
From here

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the vastness of our solar system

This is a scroll of our solar system, with the planets and distances between them to scale if the moon was represented by one pixel.
It certainly makes you realise how far apart the planets are, and how big even our solar system is.
From Kottke.org

toodle pip

a big wave during the floods

A picture taken during the recent floods featuring the Cove House Inn and a big wave.  If it hasn't been photoshopped, the bloke in the orange must have been crapping himself.

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sleaford mods - jobseeker

My current favourite record, even if it is a couple of years old.
Jobseeker by the might Sleaford Mods.



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the cast from star wars and tiny carrie fisher

I never really got into the Star Wars films, and l'm not even sure l have watched one of them all the way through. Here's the cast, out of their uniforms and all looking pretty young, but what amazed me was how small Carrie Fisher is.  I expected her to be smaller than Harrison Ford, but not this much smaller.
My flabber is well and truly gasted.

toodle pip

more bleeding poetry - life 2

More bleeding poetry!
I think l need to get out more.

LIFE 2

THE STARS SHONE BRIGHT THE HEAVENS SMILED
THE WATERS DEEP THE WEATHER MILD
THE PROMISED LAND WAS INVITING, NEAR
FILLED WITH JOY I HELD NO FEAR

BUT WHO MAY SAY WHAT THE FUTURE BRINGS
EVEN A CAGED BIRD SOMETIMES SINGS
AS THE SKY TURNS DARK AND THE WIND BLOWS COLD
THE STARS MAY GLISTEN BUT ARE NOT GOLD

ONLY NEPTUNE KNOWS WHICH DICE ARE THROWN
THE MASTER OF ALL THE TEMPEST WILD
HE RAISED HIS TRIPOD AND HE PITIED ME
AN ALBATROSS LANDED ON THE GOLDEN CHILD

 toodle pip

the eddie and the hotrods tour

In a previous life, this is what myself and Lammy were up to many, many moons ago.  Following the mighty Eddie and the Hotrods, who had rather fantastic support from Radio Stars and Squeeze.  All three bands were great to see, and all were very friendly, even going so far as to let us help set up the equipment, and have a kick around football match with them. We were invited to go along with them to their last gig in Portsmouth (we were in Swindon at the time), but for some mad reason we declined, as we wanted to get home.  Idiots.
Obviously Squeeze went on to bigger and better things, Eddie and the Hotrods ended up being swept aside by punk, and no-one remembers Radio Stars these days, but each had their own individual appeal.
Now where the Hell has the time gone?







toodle pip

lou reed and the chemical brothers - l think drugs may be involved

Two songs that have pretty obvious drug references and overtones, from different eras, but both are magnificent tracks in their own right
Lou Reed and the Velvet Underground's 'Waiting for my Man', and The Chemical Brothers 'Hey Boy Hey Girl'.
Myself and Sick Boy have been up to New York's Lexington 125 on shady business, and l can certainly identify with a lot of the visuals on the Chemicals track, so as far as relating to them goes, l'm your man, "feeling sick and dirty - more dead than alive" (or l was at the time).
However, they were happy days indeed, but obviously all behind me now, as l am currently respectable!
God knows how.

toodle pip

mr parrot video

I haven't put up a video of Mr Parrot for a while, so here he is, happily drinking tea.

toodle pip

decorating in an unusual way

Some excellent re-cycling of an old piano and a bath. Not that l'll ever get around to doing something like this, as it takes me years building up the momentum just to open a tin of paint, let alone slap it on the walls.

todle pip

an old folks home of the future

Is this how old folks homes will be in the future? If so, l'm quite looking forward to it (not that l imagine l'll live that long).

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famous albums with the dead people taken out

Famous album sleeves with the dead people taken out.
What's not to like?
From here

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