johan huibers building a replica ark - 2012 olympics

The half sized version

Johan Huibers, the carpenter man himself (not Jesus)

The full sized version

A reporter in front of the full sized version!

A giraffe on the front of the half sized version!

A Dutch self employed carpenter, Johan Huibers, has been making a full sized version of Noah's ark http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/43492787/ns/today-today_people/t/meet-man-whos-re-creating-noahs-ark/), after previously making one that was half size (http://creation.com/one-man-and-a-vision-johan-huibers-ark-builder-in-netherlands). Only stuffed animals are on board (apart from some chickens), but it looks impressive. It should be sailing up the Thames for the 2012 Summer Olympics if all goes according to plan. There must be some serious money involved in it all (the half sized one was open for tourists).

I know Jesus was a carpenter, but l certainly don't remember him building the Ark himself. I guess I'll have to brush up on my Bible reading.

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jesus grants a wish

Brian's face at the end is excellent (if you don't already know, he fancies Lois)

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muhammed ali - attica state prison poem and the lighting of the olympic torch

What a handsome, cool, hard, funny and intelligent guy he was.

It bought a tear to my eye seeing him carrying the Olympic torch in 1996.

Still cheated 'Our 'Enry' out of a title though.

And another thing......... People can be crazy. Here's a post on You Tube after an Ali clip.

@dudetube911 He is a great human being, and I believe God loves Ali so much that he made Ali suffer from the disease so all his sins could be burnt away and so Ali can go to heaven as a pure soul because he deserves it.

WavinFlag92 1 week ago

So, if l have understood this right, the good people that God loves the most are the ones who he makes suffer the most to burn away sins. Hasn't he heard of repenting for your sins?. Idiot.

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william blake and jack kirby's ideas of god

Jack Kirby , the comic book legend, had these (the black and white ones) visions of what God meant to him, and they were all hung up in his house as he liked them so much.

I much prefer them to William Blake's ideas on the same subject (the ones at the top).

The Jack Kirby photo was taken in 1982.

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beyond the moon and knocking on heavens door

These were two of the documentaries l watched over the weekend. Both were interesting and had some footage l thought might not appear (USA disasters and USSR dodgy experiments), but the best bits were the photos from Hubble and images of space (in all it's infinite glory). I am worried they have made me an evangelical agnostic (OK, they have not, l was one already).

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touching yourself

That's an easy one to answer - YES!!!

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mothers day and richard herring - christ on a bike - the second coming

Eventually got to Stockton yesterday for Mother's Day at the in laws. Had to wait ages for the FPO to get ready (even though she had been in all morning while l was at work), then had to go to Tesco's for flowers and booze. We had curry on the go all day (not for the first or last time), which was pretty good to pick at while drinking bottles of booze with the father in law (the one who does not want tales of ice pops being repeated). The FPO was trying to interest me in her sisters bambino, but once the crying started (from the baby, not me), l got out of it.

Left about 6.45pm to head to Darlington, then straight into Inside Out Comedy Club, at what used to be known as Perrys. Had two spare tickets which the club took to resell, then time for a quick ale and into the club itself. It was the first time l had been in there since it became a comedy club, and it was a pretty good venue for seeing a comic, as it only had about 100 or so people in, and everyone is reasonably close to the stage. Worked out that it is a pretty good living playing to that kind of audience, as you are still taking about £1,000 a night, plus whatever merchandise you can sell afterwards. Obviously there are overheads, and the club/promoter etc will get some dosh, but it's still better money than most bands get.

Anyhows, Richard Herring was really good. Not a laugh out loud all the way through kind of comedy show, but amusing and interesting. It was about an hour and a half altogether (there was a short interval for more ale) and really well written. He also did a good bit when he reeled off the first page of the New Testament (who begat who), which he said took him four days to learn.

I did have a quick heckle when he asked near the end if anyone thought he was Christ, where l shouted "You're not the Messiah, just a silly boy", which of course is from Monty Python's Life of Brian, but slightly incorrect, as they say "naughty boy", not "silly". This of course was picked up by Richard Herring, and he put me down for not shouting the proper quote. When speaking to him afterwards, l started to fox him by saying l did not know there was a quote and what film was he on about, but the God fearing FPO could not keep quiet, so told him l did know. Foiled again!

At least he signed my programme 'To Jamie, the real Messiah!', so it turned out alright in the end (although he probably thinks l'm a fucking idiot). Another uneventful night ticked off.

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wine bar talk about help for heroes and predeterminism

Had a good night in The Wine Bar this evening, met up with Old Joe, Ritchie, Joe Lynch, Larry and The FPO and argued about various subjects, but mainly Help For Heroes and Predeterminism /Predestination.

Although troops who have been wounded should have the best possible care, l hate all the Help for Heroes talk around the troops as l feel that it serves as a propaganda tool which has the effect of more people joining the Army. I would not mind this so much, but most of the people joining up would have had a poor education, be working class, and more than likely be from the inner cities, with no great career or University places looming ahead of them. Obviously some poshos go to Sandhurst or join as officers, but at least they will be making more of an informed choice and have a lot more options in life available to them. There is also a lot of bravado involved, going with your mates and 'looking forward to some action'. The reality is a lot of ruined lives. We might as well go back to having the old Lord Kitchiner 'Your country needs you' posters.

As for the philosophical talk, some around the table were believers and did think their whole life was already mapped out, which l found amazing. To me, life is just a series of random events which we can try and control and make the best out of, but then that is it, no Heaven, Hell or judgement. The sweet relief of death. Only joking at the end there (the sweet relief bit), but life should be lived and enjoyed as much as possible, just try to be good and not hurt anyone else. Easier said than done and l have been a right bastard in the past, but at least l am trying to be better. As for death, when l have too many aches and pains and life becomes not worth the effort, l would have no problem with killing myself, as l would rather choose my own death rather than slowly dying in a nursing home or hospital. Pass me the extra morphine l say.

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arizona sand

This is not photo shopped, it's the real deal. These sands are in Arizona and they really do look like this. I praise God.

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what religion should you be

apt correspondent

Vienna Boys’ Choir caught

up in

sex

abuse scandals

Roger Boyes, Berlin Correspondent of The Times

• 43 COMMENTS

RECOMMEND? (780)

(Alberto Pellaschiar/AP)

Georg Ratzinger has admitted hearing of cases of ill-treatment during his time as director of the Regensburg choir

The most famous choir in the world has been caught up in the wave of paedophile scandals sweeping Germany and Austria, with eight former choristers denouncing their teachers in the past few days.

An open letter from the management of the Vienna Boys’ Choir to parents expressed regret at the incidents, which were recounted by former singers now aged between 40 and 70

This report goes on for longer, but the main thing I noticed was the name of the Berlin correspondent. Didn't anyone else spot this? The world's a funny old place (not for the boys involved though)

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understanding comics and once an addict

I finished both of these books today, as I am still ploughing through the ones in the house that I have not read yet (and I am still buying more!). I got Understanding Comics for Christmas and it was really interesting, talking about what comics are and the history of the art form. It mentioned some stuff that I was not aware of, which means I have even more stuff to buy, check out, and store in the house (somewhere).

As for the Addict book, I picked it up in a second hand shop a couple of weeks ago, as I thought it may be interesting and it was cheap. It was OK for a while, interesting but not that great, until lo and behold, on page 105, he senses God for the first time. To cut a long story short, he eventually gives up the drugs and becomes a Minister with the Evangelical Church.

This is after a few false leads by God and more spells in prison, but he gets there in the end.

The thing I hate is God is never questioned, there is always an explanation for why things didn't work out when he was following God's signs etc. Also, the way the evangelical (or other religions as well), start to use crappy sayings " The Bible is an instruction book and stands for "Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth". This sort of crap really annoys me. I am a thicko about a lot of stuff, but I do know the word 'Bible' comes from the Greek 'Biblia', which represents a collection of books, which the Bible is. Some gospels were put in, some left out. Some contradict each other. A lot of the Old Testament can be kicked into touch once the New Testament starts. A lot of it has been proven to be false. If you date the timeline from the beginning of the Bible (As Bishop Usher did), the Earth is only just over 6,000 years old. No one in their right mind thinks this now. It is a collection of stories, some based on historical events, some based on earlier epics, some just made up. If you want to believe in it, go ahead, but leave me alone. We would be so much better off without religion. The asylums are full of people who think they are God, Jesus, on a mission from a higher power or whatever.

When I die, I will happily take my chances. I don't think ants or termites have souls, I don't see why we should have them. We are no better off for Jesus supposedly dying for our sins, as we still have to embrace God or go to Hell.

Pah! Bring it on - let's find out!

Rant over - toodle pip