Even internationally known super cool rock stars have to get old (unless they die early), and Steven Tyler of Aerosmith is no exception, looking at his recent beach photographs.
It's bad enough for us mere mortals, but at least we don't have to live up to a mental image of our younger days for millions of fans, with numerous films and photographs of us in our prime to perpetuate the illusion that aging only happens to other people.
I'd feel sorry for the stars if they hadn't usually had such fantastic lives, with pretty much anything they wanted just a click of the fingers away (apart from a working painting in the attic).
Remember Aerosmith and Stevie boy this way...probably off their faces (It was 1977).
The Dortmund fans unveiled a massive banner at their Europa League match this week, in the form of a sticker album, asking the club to complete their collection of trophies with this years Europa League trophy.
Absolute genius, and l doth my cap to them.
At least, for a short while, it took my mind off the disaster that is Manchester United at the moment, and their 2-1 defeat in the same tournament.
But only for a short while.
Eating from plates is just sooooo passe. The way forward is to eat from bowls, it's what all the hot skinny people are doing. It's a 'trend with traction', and they are conveniently photogenic for sharing on social media - proper instagram friendly, and no mistake.
Don't believe me? The New York Post are on the case. I'll never eat from a plate again. After all, it's the same food, but just not as good. Plus you've got the mind numbing task of having to push your food to the middle of the plate to mix it up a bit. What????
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORING.
Come on - join the bowl revolution brothers and sisters. This is the sort of stuff my great grandfather fought and died for. Let's make him proud that his death wasn't in vain.
As for my bowl, l just don't want most of the crap featured above in my one. It does mean that l can now smother my baked potatoes in even more butter, something l never thought would be possible, so hurrah! for the hipsters and their innovative forward thinking ideas.
Looking forward to the sweet release of death?
Plan ahead and order your coffin now - many are available, including these little beauties. Order them here.
Rugby’s Six Nations will see England’s pubs upgrade to a higher class of loud, annoying men.
In an extensive annual re-fit, the King George in Swindon has swapped Premier League banners with the flags of the home nations and barred all its regulars for the next month.
Landlord Stephen Malley said: “For the next few weeks we’re going to be attracting a much better class of boorish lout. Many of them will be called ‘Ollie’.
“The place will be awash with salmon-coloured trousers, desperately immature songs and posh young women who are every bit as annoying as their ghastly boyfriends.”
He added: “They’ll still get horribly pissed and vomit all over the toilet floor, but it’ll be a better educated vomit that’s programmed to say ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ even if it doesn’t really mean it.”
Rugby fan Martin Bishop said: “It’s so nice of the football fans to make way, but it will also give them an opportunity to improve themselves.”
This picture above is of the crowds milling in and around Wembley Stadium, for the 1923 FA Cup final (The White Horse one).
I've always found it amazing that so many supporters managed to get inside the stadium that day, but l am even more amazed that London appears to have disappeared, as poor old Wembley (old school one) was all out in the sticks on it's lonesome.
How times have changed.
What better way to spend Chinese New Year than in an all you can eat buffet?
The food was nice, and we had a laugh, but if l ever see another sweet and sour piece of chicken, l am going to run away scared. I know my limits.
"Go on...........one more tiny little mint.......whaffer thin"
Christmas is over - normal service has been resumed, and what better way to return than with a classic video of Cartman singing 'Poker Face'. Possibly even better than Lady Ga Ga's version, and l love that.
I only watch South Park now and again these days, but there's usually always something that makes me laugh out loud.
Especially Cartman - for many reasons, he reminds me so much of myself.
Let the madness continue.
A couple of days ago, while trying to ignore proper work, l read the comments below in the letters section in The Northern Echo. Since then, there has been no response, so here's mine.
I'm all for councils trying to save money, and the article made it out as though there are many funds that should be utilised because they are not used. A good argument.
On the other hand, speaking as a a supporter of the downtrodden, poorly educated mass who, in the future, may wish to gaze upon awe inspiring works, makes me ponder the thought....what will happen to the artworks if they are sold? I'll tell, you what. Locked away in private collections so none of the proletariat can view them. A short term gain for the councils that makes the rich happy, and the poor even more disenfranchised.
Art is for the people brothers and sisters, it's one of the rare opportunities to be close to a work of greatness, and imagine infinite possibilities, and an age of wonder.
Then again, we could flog them off to rich bastards, and spend our times looking at each other, wondering where it all went wrong (There was no revolution).
I know where l stand.
Michael Jackson himself, in various stages of colour and appearance
Michael's dermatologist, Arnold Klein (now deceased). I'm suggesting nothing
It's long been speculated that Michael Jackson's children (his birth ones, not the allegedly interfered with ones), are not genetically his, and anyone seeing them growing up must be pretty blind if they thought otherwise.
However, l've nothing against Michael bringing them up as his own, as long as everyone is happy and taken care of (with no fiddling). It's also good to see Paris having a laugh and doing the moonwalk, but l think that deep down, they may be very damaged individuals, who will be in and out of the news for years to come. Especially the girls.
For The Daily Mirror film of Paris doing a short moonwalk - look here.
The Daily News have got it spot on, an old adage that is still true today.
I think Donald Trump is a joke, but a dangerous one, who may well get elected.
Normally l would say 'Only in America', but then l think of our own loveable nincompoop, Boris Johnson. l wouldn't be surprised if he rocks up in the future as the leader of the Conservatives, and possibly the country. A bright man pretending to be a bumbling idiot, who has not hidden the fact that he thinks some people (let's face it - the poor) are too stupid to improve their lives. I suppose it's still better than the spoon fed idiots acting bright that we are lumbered with at the moment.
But not much.
Bring on the revolution!
A new Beatles statue by Andrew Edwards has been unveiled on Liverpool's Pier Head by John Lennon's sister, Julia Baird, and the deputy mayor of Liverpool.
It is looking towards Ireland and the United States, and at least it looks like them, unlike some earlier efforts.
The United States' largest destroyer, the USS Zumwalt, is heading out into the Atlantic for sea trials.
It looks pretty impressive, state of the art, and space age (or a council block of flats like The Byker Wall), but the best thing about it, is that the captain is called.......wait for it..............Captain James Kirk.
His parents must have had a sense of humour, but surely (don't call me Shirley), due to nominative determinism, he was always destined to have that kind of job.
More about this story here.
Spot the original one below. Clue - one is minus the 'T'.
As a fan of pretty much all things Lou Reed wise (discounting Metal Machine Music), and a lot of the Andy Warhol stuff, the death of Holly Woodlawn on Sunday was another addition to that great art collective in the sky.
Don't know who she is? Only the 'Holly came from Miami FLA' in Lou Reed's 'Walk on the Wild Side', one of the greatest singles of all time, which reached the giddy heights of #10 in the UK charts back in 1972. 'Little Joe' is still alive, but he's the last one of those mentioned in the song that is still alive now.
Luckily, there's still John Cale, Moe Tucker and Doug Yule left from The Velvet Underground.
Enjoy them while you can. More about Holly here.
Well l never! I didn't realise until last week that Bon Scott, the original singer of AC/Dc, used to be in a band called The Valentines. I always thought that he was AC/DC's driver, who then took over vocal duties, but The Valentines have never been on my radar, despite loving the early AC/DC stuff and seeing them live many times.
Also....Nice hair.
I was reading some old newspapers recently (as you do) when l saw this apology in The Sunday Mirror for an earlier article about Lee Rigby's fiancee having a relationship with one of his army pals. No doubt the original story would have been plastered all over the front page, but most people who read it would not have realised how incorrect it was.
As l've never read the original story, l don't know how much of it was true, but going by the (very small) apology, it seems not a lot.
No wonder l never take anything at face value.
I'm a fan of both David Bowie and Scott Walker, and found the clip below pretty moving. Even though it is a few years old, it has only recently come to my attention, so bear with me.
It's Bowie's 50th birthday, and people are paying their tributes to him. Now Bowie is normally a pretty cool character, and usually keeps his emotions well hidden, but he obviously fails to do so with the Scott Walker message.
Tears may even have been shed during the pause.
"He really got to me there, l'm afraid"
While I still don't agree with the air strikes against Syria, l will admit that Hilary Benn's speech in favour of the strikes was particularly well thought out and persuasive, deserving of the applause.
It also confirmed my loathing for David Cameron, when the prospect of him apologising to Jeremy Corbyn for calling Corbyn a terrorist sympathiser was suggested, as Cameron's weasily smile and smug look to his colleague confirmed to me (as if it needed confirming) that he is a spoon fed arrogant patronising toff of the worst kind. If l'm reading too much into that look, so be it. l'll take my chances that l have summed him up correctly, or at least to the best of my abilities without a private education behind me.
Twat.
I've been catching up on 'You Me, And The Apocalypse' on Sky recently, and without giving anything away, 'There's A Storm A Coming' by Richard Hawley was used at the end of a recent episode, to great effect, fitting the dramatic conclusion of the particular storyline perfectly.
It was also featured in the recent version of 'Brighton Rock', and l nearly posted about the song after seeing that, but never got around to it (things to do, fish to fry etc).
Myself and a friend (Powlie - l'm thinking of you) argue all the time about who first introduced the other to Richard Hawley (obviously l introduced him), and Cole's Corner is still one of my favourite albums, so to hear Mr Hawley enhancing my movie watching experience, is obviously an added bonus for me.
To make up for my tardiness, here's two versions of the song, one live, and one from the Brighton Rock soundtrack, which features the heavier version l (and film makers) am so enamoured with.
It builds up after about 2.30m.
Superb stuff - expect to hear it in lots of adverts soon.
Here's an interesting short video of how the Syrian conflict has played out over the last few years, and how, to any right seeing individual, it can easily escalate into a much larger conflict.
It's a mess, and l'm not sure what the answer is myself, but l do know that bombing areas in the Middle East, with the unavoidable deaths of innocent men, women and children, is only going to radicalise more extremists, and put the western nations at greater immediate and long term risk, not less. As a start, I'd probably go for sanctions, and preventing / persuading other countries not to buy ISIS / ISIL oil or support them, and try to get the neighbouring countries to sort it out,but l can't see that happening in the in the near future, if at all.
I've said it before, but I'd rather have more freedom and take the risks involved, and show we are a caring encompassing nation that welcomes other races and religions, promoting free speech, as long as it is not preaching hatred and violence. It's already illegal to incite in such a way, but l'll be treading a fine line, as there are a few politicians of the English kind that l would love to punch in the face (at least), and often state this in public, despite me being an easy going kind of fellow.
Anyway, Private Eye have summed some of it up. You can't defeat ISIS by bombing, as they can plan attacks from anywhere, and probably have supporters in all countries, albeit in small numbers (I assume), but as to the answer? It may require a proper, troops on the ground all out war, and who wants that? I'll take my chances with a free and open society any day, and still travel to places such as Egypt, Tunisia, France and Belgium.
Remember to put that on my headstone if l get blown up.
