the cast from star wars and tiny carrie fisher

I never really got into the Star Wars films, and l'm not even sure l have watched one of them all the way through. Here's the cast, out of their uniforms and all looking pretty young, but what amazed me was how small Carrie Fisher is.  I expected her to be smaller than Harrison Ford, but not this much smaller.
My flabber is well and truly gasted.

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the magnificent seven and some of it's foreign film posters

 

 

The Magnificent Seven is an overrated film as far as l am concerned, but seeing as it was just repeated on TV, l got suckered into watching it again.  Although l do like it generally, the main selling point is seeing such huge stars together in the same movie, even allowing for some overacting aplenty (Robert Vaughan and Horst Buchholz, l'm looking at you two).  There's also some cool and measured performances by Yul Bryyner, Steve McQueen and James Coburn, and Eli Wallach is always a splendidly swarthy and sweaty bad guy, but it's pretty slow paced in parts, and the ending seems to drag on, and then finish too suddenly.
The soundtrack is by Elmer Bernstein, which is one of the most stirring of all time, so a couple of hours can still fly by before you can manage to drag yourself up to put the kettle on (or maybe that's just my sloth like laziness).
I've only had the DVD of The Seven Samurai (the film it's based on) for about two or three years.  Maybe l should get around to watching that, as l have never seen it before, and it's meant to be much better.
So little time...

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clockwork orange lobby cards

More crap that l would like to have framed.  Lobby cards from the film of  'A Clockwork Orange', one of my favourite films of all time (which would explain a lot). Viddy well brothers and sisters.

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the real tarzan of the apes and gerald the gorilla

Tarzan of the apes, looking a bit camper and longer haired than the best known Johnny Weissmuller portrayals.
Brothers and sisters, I present to you the largely forgotten Elmo Lincoln (Otto Elmo Linkenhelt), the first movie Tarzan from the 1918 -1921 versions (unless you count Gordon Griffith, who played the young Tarzan).
This was a time when even wild men of the jungle weren't afraid of their feminine side, and who also looked as though they had a more than 'special' relationship with the apes.
Lincoln also made fleeting appearances in a couple of the 1940's Tarzan films, then starring Weissmuller (Tarzan'e New York Adventure) and Lex Barker (Tarzan's Magic Fountain), but was uncredited.
Fame can be so fleeting.

And thinking of special relationships....Gerald The Gorilla, from Not The Nine O'Clock News, featuring the recently departed Mel Smith, with Pamela Stephenson and Rowan Atkinson as Gerald.
Wild...l was absolutely livid!



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over used movie poster ideas

Movies.  Don't you just love them?  It's bad enough that so many movies follow the same kind of formulas, but it's even worse when the posters for them also follow suit.  Here's some fine examples, but more can be found at this excellent imgur page, plus the meanings behind the artwork.

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the gravity trailers

I am looking forward to Alfonso Cuaron's  'Gravity' movie soooooooooooo much.  Even though l suspect it will be a lovey dovey weepie with a nice ending (starring George Clooney and Sandra Bullock), the CGI images of the Earth and space look amazing, and a total trip (in more ways than one).  It should also rabbit on about The Kessler Effect / Syndrome, which, unless we find a way to get rid of the debris orbiting the planet in Low Earth Orbit, will prevent us going into space in the future (at least for a long time).
Splendid and interesting stuff, and it had better not let me down.

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alan moore - big numbers and pop will eat itself - def con 1 and can you (u) dig it

As the wonderful Pop Will Eat Itself sang in 'Def Con 1' (a song heavily based on 'Watchmen'), "Alan Moore knows the score".
He certainly does, and this is one of the many gems l have recently unearthed (yes....from the ongoing garage saga), signed by the great man himself. It's a shame it's not a signed copy of 'Watchmen', but hey ho, it's still a treasured item.
This is not the whole cover, as my scanner couldn't fit it all on, and (of course) my copy is in great condition, as the dark shadows are just from the scan.
Big Numbers - big book (but not one of his best).
Thinking about it, re-watching the video reminds me that when l first read the 'Watchmen' comics, they actually belonged to the one and only Graham Crabb (from Pop Will Eat Itself'), as he was sharing a squat in Highgate with a mate of mine at the time, and l was crashing there.
Nowadays l sing "Colin Moore knows the score" when l see a lad l know called........yes, you guessed it.
I really need to get a life.




Edit - I just realised. The Alan Moore quote is from another of their songs (Can you (u) Dig it?)
Ah well, any excuse to post another of  The Poppies tunes.



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the green lantern gets power ringed to death

Not a fate l would wish upon my worst enemy.  The Green Lantern is about to get power ringed to death.
No wonder he is looking so pissed off.
By the way, the Green Lantern film starring Ryan Reynolds was one of the worst of it's kind l have ever had the misfortune to see.  I'm talking crap really (no change there), as l didn't really sit through it all.  I switched it off after about half an hour, and trust me, l really wanted to like it, as l used to read and love Green Lantern comics when l was a kid.  However, if it looks like crap, sounds like crap, and probably smelt like crap on the set, it's crap of the highest kind.

Avoid this film - it's crap

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jamie foxx in the new spider-man movie

I'm already looking forward to Amazing Spider-man 2 (due out next year), which will be featuring Jamie Foxx as Electro (one of Spidey's arch enemies).  Here's Jamie as his alter ego, the non more geeky Maxwell Dillon.
My best friend used to dress like that until l got his mind right (Hello Robbo!).
I just hope they try to stick to the stories and timeline in the comics, even if Electro is going to be based on the Ultimate version.

The Ultimate Electro

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the league of gentlemen (1960) - basil dearden

 

The League of Gentlemen lobby cards

A right old carry on and make no mistake old boy, The League Of Gentlemen has Norman Hyde (Jack Hawkins) assembling a ragtag group of corrupt ex soldiers, all specialists in their own fields, so that they can pull off a bank job (and possibly inadvertently inspire The Great Train Robbery).
The job itself is based on a fictional crime book (The Golden Fleece), and is planned meticulously, but will they get away with it?
There's plenty of the old 'What ho's' and 'I say Darling', and as to be expected, the acting is completely over the top in places, but it is certainly enjoyable if you like old black and white movies.
There's also innuendos towards homosexual behaviour (still a criminal offence at the time) and a short mincing performance from the one and only Oliver Reed (looking very attractive), which is so camp it has to be seen to be believed.
Featuring a great line when Hyde is asked about a portrait of his wife, and if she is dead.  He replies "I regret to say the bitch is still going strong".  Feisty language back in the day, and even now.
The lesson to be learned?  Cover every eventuality, no matter how insignificant they might seem.  I know of what l speak, as l have served some time after not covering my own tracks in the past (obviously l'm now rehabilitated).  You don't want to end up in chokey.



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vicky cristina barcelona (2008) - woody allen

Vicky Cristina Barcelona is a homage to both Barcelona, and Gaudi's architectural vision, featuring beautiful people, passion and romance, fantastic shots of the city itself (suspiciously clean and pick pocket free), and an assortment of poets, artists and writers (and rich people).  Who would make a film like this?
Two girl friends go to Barcelona for the summer.  One (Cristina/Scarlett Johansson) is a spontaneous romantic dreamer who is always looking for something different to experience, but unsure of what, thinking that will make her happy.  The other (Vicky/Rebecca Hall) is steady and pragmatic, is about to be married, and is in love.
They then meet Juan (Javier Bardem), a moody, intense, enigmatic painter (is there any other sort in these kind of films?) and both end up having an affair with him, despite his unstable ex wife (Maria/Penelope Cruz) moving back in with him (resulting in a menage a trois involving Cristina).
All well and good, but by the end, everyone ends up unfulfilled.
The painter and his ex wife love each other, but can't live together by themselves. Vicky falls for the painter, but then decides he is too crazy for her, so carries on with her marriage.  Cristina, the romantic searcher, once happiness and contentment is attained, gets bored and decides she wants something else, and moves on, still searching for something to satisfy her wanderlust   Even the old woman they have been staying with has an affair because she is bored.
An artificial portrait of life and romance, where no one is ugly or poor, the days are long and sun drenched, and there is always a local supremely talented musician to go and swoon to.  There is love in the long grass, accidental shootings, and spontaneous trips away by private aeroplanes.  It's got Woody Allen stamped all over it, and it is indeed, one of his.
I still enjoyed it, even if it did annoy me, as the characters and locations spoke nothing to me about my life (as Morrissey would say).

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harrison ford won't answer questions about star wars

I have never been a fan of Star Wars, and can't see what all of the fuss is about.  I guess you had to be a certain age or something and by the time it came out, l had moved on from most sci fi films of that type, preferring stuff like '2001 - A Space Odyssey'.
However, Harrison Ford used to be pretty good back in the day, and he remembers what it is to act on The Jimmy Kimmel show, where he refuses to take Star Wars questions.
Thankfully, you don't have to be a fan of the movies to enjoy this.

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the piano (1993) - jane campion

I haven't been able to sleep at night since seeing this.  Why you ask?  Because of Harvey Keitel getting naked yet again, that's why.  I had only just got over seeing him up to no good and butt naked in 'Bad Lieutenant' (the 1992 version), and l wasn't expecting more from him (not in that way) in this.
Anyway, l digress.
'The Piano' has been out for ages, but it was one of those films that l didn't really fancy seeing, as it seemed too wimpy when l saw the trailers for it back in the day.  I kept thinking l would catch it eventually on TV, but have never been that fussed when it has been shown over the intervening years.
Until now that is.
It was, as l suspected it might be, a bit drippy for my tastes, but there was a bit more to it than l had imagined, what with the nudity and love scenes, plus the odd bit of violence and excitement towards the end.
Some might consider it a gothic masterpiece, what with the period clothes and a mute, piano playing heroine, all detached and alone (apart from her young child), until she falls for another, in muddy and untamed 1850's New Zealand.  Holly Hunter was magnificent in it, but l wasn't that smitten, and found it to be pretty dull in places, and certainly not deserving of all the praise, even if it was unusual.
Also, at the end, the clicking of the metal finger on the piano would drive anybody crazy.  Why not put some rubber on it, or a bit of cloth?  Things like that really bug me.

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bad teacher (2011) - jake kasdan

Cameron Diaz is Elizabeth Halsey, the (eponymous?) Bad Teacher from the title, who has to stay on at school when her rich boyfriend ends their engagement. She has little interest in the job or the pupils, and is just after doing as little work as possible and having a good time (who isn't?).  While she is killing time, she is also on the lookout to find and snag another rich man, this time to marry and retire with.  Nerdy and dull substitute teacher Scott Delacorte then arrives on the scene (in the form of Justine Timberlake), and as he is from a very wealthy family, Halsey tries to woo him.  Unfortunately for her, she faces competition from another teacher, the neurotic but dedicated Amy Squirrel, played by Lucy Punch (as though that would have happened in real life).  Deciding to save for a boob job, Halsey then discovers there is a monetary prize for the best class results, so she changes tactics, and decides to win the money by any means possible.  All the while, she herself is being wooed by the gym teacher, who, because of the fact he is just an ordinary joe with no money, she bats off (but of course, grows to like).  Don't bother asking me who she ends up with, l think it wouldn't take much brainpower to work that one out.  There's drug use, swearing a plenty, boob inspecting by Diaz (I thought that was my job), drinking and a general all round bad attitude (once again, my job). A much better film than l anticipated, but although it is not as good as 'Bad Santa', it is still one of the better rom com films out there (although let's face it, that's not saying a lot).


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