Being working class - what is it good for? It pisses me off when people pretend class does not matter, everyone has had the same opportunities and there is no such distinctions made when applying for jobs, the army, or university. So many middle class asses pretend they are working class, they have had it hard, they have made it on their own etc etc. What bollocks. I don't care what class a person is, as long as they are honest about it. There are good and bad in every class, l defend the working classes as l am one of them, but fuck knows it is difficult. l would be the first to admit there are loads of narrow minded, vicious dickheads amongst the working classes, and way too many who vote Conservative because they read the Sun newspaper and don't question anything - no wonder the rich take the piss. however, at least most of them have had a piss poor education and hardly any parental backing, so don't expect a lot and don't think they deserve anything great from life, except for being factory fodder or front line army troops. Can't blame them if they turn to crime to make money, although a lot of the time it is robbing their own class, when they should be robbing the rich. The middle/upper classes have had a great education and make informed choices when it comes to taking the piss. I do know some middle and upper class people are sound, but for fucks sake, l wish they would stop pretending they are from the streets and have had it hard. Just be thankful you've had it good, and treat everyone the same. Working class heroes? Don't get me started on John Lennon either, semi detached suburban hero more like, but at least he stood up for the working class folks.
Bit pissed at the moment and rambling, so l will head off, as l have a BBQ to go to in 15minutes - in a privately owned house as well. Class traitor l am. Toodle pip
Wednesday, 28 May 2008
Monday, 26 May 2008
mum has died
It’s happened at last. Our mum died about 4.20pm on Saturday, after being pretty much out of it for a couple of days. We were all there the night (and day) before as we were expecting her to go any minute, but she kept hanging on. One of my sisters kids was there with us when she died, as was one of my mums ex partners, which, although it was good of him to visit, we would rather he was not present at that time.
Strange to see her take her last breath, and be such an empty shell afterwards. Still had her eyes and mouth open, which was freaking out my brother and sister, so l closed her eyes. They didn’t want me to attempt closing her mouth in case l broke her jaw or something.
Although everyone was upset, we all agreed that she should have died earlier, with medical assistance if need be. She was saying she wanted it all to be over the last time she was able to speak. We did ask if extra morphine could be given but they could not do so to the extent we wanted.
Got to sort out her bungalow and possessions now, plus arrange her funeral. Fun Fun Fun as the Beach boys would say.
My brother came up from Leeds a few days ago and now wishes he had stayed there, as he cannot get the image of mum dying like that, he wishes he had just remembered her when she was still alive and at least able to talk a bit. Will probably remember her alive more as time passes, although he will not forget the final day, at the moment it is too fresh in his mind. He went back to Leeds this afternoon, taking our sisters two kids with him to have a break for a few days. He was upset last night and stayed at my house, rat catching and chatting (yes, we still have bastard rats).
I felt sorry for everyone as they were crying and upset, but to tell the truth, l felt nothing but a fascination at witnessing her die. Still not been upset about it, maybe l will later, but l doubt it. Am pissed off l don’t feel anything, as l should do, but that is due to my upbringing, therefore not my fault (l say anyway).
Her last words to me were to ask if l enjoyed the football on Wednesday night. At least she realised how important that was to me ( l know, l am a callous bastard ).
Can soon start to write about other stuff on the blog, let’s face it, this has taken over recently.
Toodle pip
Strange to see her take her last breath, and be such an empty shell afterwards. Still had her eyes and mouth open, which was freaking out my brother and sister, so l closed her eyes. They didn’t want me to attempt closing her mouth in case l broke her jaw or something.
Although everyone was upset, we all agreed that she should have died earlier, with medical assistance if need be. She was saying she wanted it all to be over the last time she was able to speak. We did ask if extra morphine could be given but they could not do so to the extent we wanted.
Got to sort out her bungalow and possessions now, plus arrange her funeral. Fun Fun Fun as the Beach boys would say.
My brother came up from Leeds a few days ago and now wishes he had stayed there, as he cannot get the image of mum dying like that, he wishes he had just remembered her when she was still alive and at least able to talk a bit. Will probably remember her alive more as time passes, although he will not forget the final day, at the moment it is too fresh in his mind. He went back to Leeds this afternoon, taking our sisters two kids with him to have a break for a few days. He was upset last night and stayed at my house, rat catching and chatting (yes, we still have bastard rats).
I felt sorry for everyone as they were crying and upset, but to tell the truth, l felt nothing but a fascination at witnessing her die. Still not been upset about it, maybe l will later, but l doubt it. Am pissed off l don’t feel anything, as l should do, but that is due to my upbringing, therefore not my fault (l say anyway).
Her last words to me were to ask if l enjoyed the football on Wednesday night. At least she realised how important that was to me ( l know, l am a callous bastard ).
Can soon start to write about other stuff on the blog, let’s face it, this has taken over recently.
Toodle pip
Friday, 23 May 2008
champions of europe
Get in my son!! Champions again and it was a good game - great to see Terry miss the penalty, pity it wasn't Ashley Cole instead. Superb stuff - still out celebrating the next day. Only complaint is Sky recorder never taped it all on ITV or Sky, missed out the last few minutes on both recordings, have to be a strong letter sent off to them. Long wait now till the new season. Toodle pip
Monday, 19 May 2008
more cancer and rats
Here we go with another thrilling update of my mums condition and the rat situation.
First of (l suppose or l will look pretty mean), my mum is (still!!) alive. No change really, we are still expecting her to die every time we visit or leave her, but the old girl is hanging on. Still have trouble understanding her, and she doesn’t always make sense (no change there then), but at least she is awake when we visit.
The rat situation seems to be getting better. Just been outside to check (it is 3.46am) and there were none about, except for one trapped in the rat trap we bought. l have currently caught three of the little gits, one died, one l let go away from our house, and one is in the trap now. There was one on top of the rabbit hutch earlier on, so they are not all dead. Don’t know if the coca cola l have been leaving is killing them or not, there defiantly appears to be fewer, but l am also feeding the rabbits just before dusk, then locking them away so the rats can’t get to the food. What great sport, non stop excitement round our way.
Still not sorted the bastard internet upstairs, l am doing this on the upstairs computer and will then transfer it to the downstairs one (and onto the net) in the morning. Been to busy recently, but will have to do something. My brother is going back to Leeds after visiting our mum in the morning as he has to sign on (he was recently made redundant). He is going to stay down there for a couple of days and then come back up. He is half expecting our mum to die as he is travelling back to Leeds, but can’t just stay up here indefinitely as he has his family in Leeds to see. Hey ho, lets see what this week brings (European cup final on Wednesday – everything stops for that!).
Toodle pip
First of (l suppose or l will look pretty mean), my mum is (still!!) alive. No change really, we are still expecting her to die every time we visit or leave her, but the old girl is hanging on. Still have trouble understanding her, and she doesn’t always make sense (no change there then), but at least she is awake when we visit.
The rat situation seems to be getting better. Just been outside to check (it is 3.46am) and there were none about, except for one trapped in the rat trap we bought. l have currently caught three of the little gits, one died, one l let go away from our house, and one is in the trap now. There was one on top of the rabbit hutch earlier on, so they are not all dead. Don’t know if the coca cola l have been leaving is killing them or not, there defiantly appears to be fewer, but l am also feeding the rabbits just before dusk, then locking them away so the rats can’t get to the food. What great sport, non stop excitement round our way.
Still not sorted the bastard internet upstairs, l am doing this on the upstairs computer and will then transfer it to the downstairs one (and onto the net) in the morning. Been to busy recently, but will have to do something. My brother is going back to Leeds after visiting our mum in the morning as he has to sign on (he was recently made redundant). He is going to stay down there for a couple of days and then come back up. He is half expecting our mum to die as he is travelling back to Leeds, but can’t just stay up here indefinitely as he has his family in Leeds to see. Hey ho, lets see what this week brings (European cup final on Wednesday – everything stops for that!).
Toodle pip
Saturday, 17 May 2008
cancer and the rats
Well, we can't believe it, mum is still alive and hanging on, my brother is still up from Leeds and we are still waiting for a phone call anytime from the hospital. l would have bet anything that she would have been dead by now, but that's probably why l am not a doctor (as l am too thick). She can be understood slightly now and is eating a small amount of food, but is still very hard to make sense of (no change there then).
On a different note, we have had rats going into our rabbits hutch that is kept outside. The little sods have been taking shelter in there during the night and eating some of the rabbit food. Saw at least five rats run out of the hutch yesterday morning. The rabbits do not seem to be affected by this, and have been sitting in their run next to rats, without either of them appearing to be bothered. Bought a humane rat trap and have caught two rats so far, also tried putting some coca cola down for the rats (spoiling them). read on the Internet that if rats drink coca cola, it kills them, let's see if it turns out to be true. Mind you, apart from this blog, l wouldn't trust anything 100% l had read on the Internet. We also have a different front for the rabbit hutch, so we can enclose them at night after feeding them, the last one had a gap so the rabbits could come and go as they pleased. Further updates to come (what an exciting life!).
Still not got our Internet connection sorted out on the upstairs computer, may have to get someone in to look at it (Louise, if you are reading this, that means you!). l am going to have a go at it this weekend, lot of good that will do.
Toodle pip
On a different note, we have had rats going into our rabbits hutch that is kept outside. The little sods have been taking shelter in there during the night and eating some of the rabbit food. Saw at least five rats run out of the hutch yesterday morning. The rabbits do not seem to be affected by this, and have been sitting in their run next to rats, without either of them appearing to be bothered. Bought a humane rat trap and have caught two rats so far, also tried putting some coca cola down for the rats (spoiling them). read on the Internet that if rats drink coca cola, it kills them, let's see if it turns out to be true. Mind you, apart from this blog, l wouldn't trust anything 100% l had read on the Internet. We also have a different front for the rabbit hutch, so we can enclose them at night after feeding them, the last one had a gap so the rabbits could come and go as they pleased. Further updates to come (what an exciting life!).
Still not got our Internet connection sorted out on the upstairs computer, may have to get someone in to look at it (Louise, if you are reading this, that means you!). l am going to have a go at it this weekend, lot of good that will do.
Toodle pip
Wednesday, 14 May 2008
cancer news nearly finished and fainting
Been in to see my mum twice today, once with my brother and sister, and again later on with my wife and my sisters kids. Mum cannot talk properly now and is pretty weak, also doped up on morphine (lucky bugger). We think that she may well die during the night, or if not, tomorrow. She is not going to make the weekend anyway. The kids wanted to see her for the last time while she was still alive, one of them also wants to come in and see her when she has died. Not bothered about doing that myself, l would rather remember people from when they were alive, but as l will have to drive them in, l will probably have a look myself. We stressed my mum did not want resuscitating (not that they were going to try) as she had been going on about it. Now it's just a case of hanging around anticipating a phone call from the hospital, unless she survives the night, in which case l will go through again in the morning with my brother, sister and wife. Work have spoken to me today and said l could have as long as l want off (they will regret saying that!). Good news, as there will be the funeral to sort out and her house to clear. Nothing that any of us want really, so there won't be any arguments about who inherits what, as it's all mainly junk. Never know though, maybe she has a secret bank account she hadn't told us about.
Also flaked out again yesterday, something that happens to me now and again if l forget to eat as my sugar levels drop - you would never think l forgot at all looking at the state of me, but it's true. Never injured myself as l was sitting down at the time, but it is still embarrassing as l was in the pub. Thankfully it only lasts about 30 seconds and then l am fine again. No warning signs at all and l am never aware l have done it as l am fine afterwards, just what l am told has happened, unless of course if l fall over. Been checked out and everything is OK so l have to have some chocolate or sweet stuff (two crunchies yesterday) straight after or it may happen again. Sods law l don't even like chocolate that much. That's it for now Toodle pip
Also flaked out again yesterday, something that happens to me now and again if l forget to eat as my sugar levels drop - you would never think l forgot at all looking at the state of me, but it's true. Never injured myself as l was sitting down at the time, but it is still embarrassing as l was in the pub. Thankfully it only lasts about 30 seconds and then l am fine again. No warning signs at all and l am never aware l have done it as l am fine afterwards, just what l am told has happened, unless of course if l fall over. Been checked out and everything is OK so l have to have some chocolate or sweet stuff (two crunchies yesterday) straight after or it may happen again. Sods law l don't even like chocolate that much. That's it for now Toodle pip
Tuesday, 13 May 2008
stalker
While out for an Indian with my family and wife tonight, they reminded me of a stalker l once had. Funny how you forget stuff that is so insane. This girl came up from Eastborne and stayed with my mother on the pretext of looking for a job oop north. l used to sell magazines, and she had met me and written to me, nothing wrong with that, and although l used to have a lot of sex in those days with girls who had met me doing that sort of stuff, l never had sex with her. When she said she wanted to come to Yorkshire and find work, my mother had a spare room and everything appeared to be fine. We met up, l introduced her to my mother, she went out with my friends and my soon to be wife, she wrote to her sister and said she loved me and we were together, she told my soon to be wife that she loved me and would do anything for me, and then denied it the next day (although l heard it) - start sounding a bit weird or what? The crux of it was she also pretended to be a top hair stylist and after a lot (and a lot more) of persuasion, she pretended to cut my brothers hair, in my mums kitchen, with everyone watching. She spent about half an hour snipping away, then stormed out of the kitchen, leaving no hair on the floor. We all fell about and my brother thought it was a crap hair cut. When he looked in the mirror and discovered his hair was exactly the same as before, he was lost for words. We then looked in her bedroom and discovered letters from her sister, ripped up in the bin. Putting them together, we read that her sister was congratulating her for being happy and with me, glad that our (so called) relationship had worked out. l telephoned her sister to say that l was concerned and it was all lies. She said she would try to speak to her, same as l said l would. Anyway, next thing we all know, she had buggered off. Bastard. l could have done anything with that woman. Also, l can say say stuff like that because l work with people with mental problems, so there. l may have had other stalkers, l may have them now, perhaps they are just too clever to be spotted. Maybe my wife is a stalker claiming her ultimate prize (the poor sod). Who knows, l have certainly had girls telling my wife they used to go out with me, when they never. Must be the aftershave. People are mad, which is great for me, as it keeps me in a job. Toodle pip
Monday, 12 May 2008
fantastic new cancer update
So, mother is still alive and my brother is now staying till God knows when. He went to the office in Richmond to sign on as he is currently unemployed, and after exchanging phone calls with the Leeds office he was deemed OK to stay oop north and comfort his (and my) mum. Been to see her this morning, when we got kicked out as her catheter bag was full or it had come loose. Either way, there was leakage and we had to leave the room while she was cleaned up. Came back after lunch, to find her lying on her side after a suppository. What a fun day she was having. My sister withdrew the rest of our mums money from the bank before she dies (my mum, not my sister) and l managed to nick it off her without my sister noticing, while we were all in the wine bar. Forget to tell her before l left, so she should be panicking about it just about now. Next time she has money on her, she will keep a closer eye on it, hard lesson but fair. mum seemed miles better today, despite all the waterworks shenanigans going on, hope it's not her perking up just before she dies, although, as l have stated before, that would probably be the best for her. The remaining close family went for an Indian at White shops about 6pm, then went to our mums bungalow to divide up her DVDs and Cd's between us. What a load of crap though. After a few choices each, we really were not that bothered what we got, so just chose anything. Left a load of Cd's for our sister as my brother didn't want them, and l would rather watch Liverpool win than take a lot of the crap home. watched some new family guy when l got home with the missus, forgot how great it can be. It's sometimes a bit hit and miss and l don't always get the American jokes regarding their TV shows, but it is one of the funniest things on TV when they get it right.
Did l mention Manchester United won the league yesterday, beating Wigan 2-0 away? Once again, l hope we stuff Chelsea in the European cup final (as l still prefer to call it - keep it old school). Anywhoos, l am a bit pissed as l have been out since 10.30am and is hard work spending all day with my family and wife, l would rather relax and do bugger all, as l am a lazy sod (although l am also off work at the moment - superb!!). Told my wife this morning l reckon my mum will die tonight or tomorrow. let's see how right l am by the next time l post. Till the Toodle pip
Did l mention Manchester United won the league yesterday, beating Wigan 2-0 away? Once again, l hope we stuff Chelsea in the European cup final (as l still prefer to call it - keep it old school). Anywhoos, l am a bit pissed as l have been out since 10.30am and is hard work spending all day with my family and wife, l would rather relax and do bugger all, as l am a lazy sod (although l am also off work at the moment - superb!!). Told my wife this morning l reckon my mum will die tonight or tomorrow. let's see how right l am by the next time l post. Till the Toodle pip
Saturday, 10 May 2008
cancer and the bastard computer
Well, the fucking computer upstairs is playing up and l can’t get an internet connection on the bastard thing, hence a lack of posts recently.
As l write this, it is Friday night, just after watching Peep show, which was great, better series so far than the last one. Going to put this on the blog on Saturday, using one of the laptops. Anyhows….
Mum is now on her last legs (so to speak, as she can no longer walk). Deteriorated a lot in the last day and l would be surprised if she lasts till next weekend. Wouldn’t be surprised if she died this weekend.
She has seen a few people this week and my brother is still up here from Leeds, was going to go back Saturday but may stay longer now, haven’t spoken to him about it since we visited this morning.
My sisters kid also came today, taking the day off school to do so, before going to Newcastle for the weekend. I reckon it may be the last time they see each other, but who knows, find out more tomorrow.
Have to buy my mum some more bottles of coke before visiting, better not stock up as it may all go to waste. Another jolly day awaiting, especially for my mum. Let’s hope she doesn’t keep throwing up black stuff (she also has blood in her urine). The sooner it is over the better, although she will miss Manchester United doing the double this year. Mind you, she supports Liverpool so it is probably best if she went now. Toodle pip
As l write this, it is Friday night, just after watching Peep show, which was great, better series so far than the last one. Going to put this on the blog on Saturday, using one of the laptops. Anyhows….
Mum is now on her last legs (so to speak, as she can no longer walk). Deteriorated a lot in the last day and l would be surprised if she lasts till next weekend. Wouldn’t be surprised if she died this weekend.
She has seen a few people this week and my brother is still up here from Leeds, was going to go back Saturday but may stay longer now, haven’t spoken to him about it since we visited this morning.
My sisters kid also came today, taking the day off school to do so, before going to Newcastle for the weekend. I reckon it may be the last time they see each other, but who knows, find out more tomorrow.
Have to buy my mum some more bottles of coke before visiting, better not stock up as it may all go to waste. Another jolly day awaiting, especially for my mum. Let’s hope she doesn’t keep throwing up black stuff (she also has blood in her urine). The sooner it is over the better, although she will miss Manchester United doing the double this year. Mind you, she supports Liverpool so it is probably best if she went now. Toodle pip
Wednesday, 7 May 2008
cancer time again
So, time for the latest thrilling installment. Mum is now at the Friary in Richmond, pretty good room with a nice view. The sister told me it was the best room in the place, which may well be true. Obviously it is a short term stay and they probably want to make the last couple of weeks as nice as possible. Her brother Ray (plus wife and in laws), came up from Liverpool on Monday, arriving just as l turned up with my sister and brother (who came up from Leeds the same day). Couldn't have had better timing if we planned it.
Great to see them all and my mum was a bit shocked to see everyone walking in at the same time. Ray said he was going to come again in a couple of weeks (if mum lasts that long), otherwise it will be for the funeral.
Also had my mate Robbo and his wife Kerry calling round, as it was a year to the day since his mum died, and he wanted to put flowers on her grave (he stayed in the car, his wife did the flower bit). We all went to Wetherspoons for lunch before they went back to the Boro and we went to my mums (over the road).
Trying to sort out stuff at the moment like cancelling Sky and seeing what my mum wants for the funeral. We are maybe going for a coffin that has been painted by my sisters kids, but we haven't asked the kids yet, they may feel freaked out by it. Mother isn't bothered, as she said, she won't see it anyway.
Got £100 of her yesterday (way hay!!) which l spent on an external memory thingie for the computer, the rest (£20) l put on a horse which won (another way Hay!!). Spent the winnings in the Wine bar with my brother and sister. My brother is here till Friday so there's a lot of entertaining to do till then. More fabulous updates soon!
Toodle pip.
Great to see them all and my mum was a bit shocked to see everyone walking in at the same time. Ray said he was going to come again in a couple of weeks (if mum lasts that long), otherwise it will be for the funeral.
Also had my mate Robbo and his wife Kerry calling round, as it was a year to the day since his mum died, and he wanted to put flowers on her grave (he stayed in the car, his wife did the flower bit). We all went to Wetherspoons for lunch before they went back to the Boro and we went to my mums (over the road).
Trying to sort out stuff at the moment like cancelling Sky and seeing what my mum wants for the funeral. We are maybe going for a coffin that has been painted by my sisters kids, but we haven't asked the kids yet, they may feel freaked out by it. Mother isn't bothered, as she said, she won't see it anyway.
Got £100 of her yesterday (way hay!!) which l spent on an external memory thingie for the computer, the rest (£20) l put on a horse which won (another way Hay!!). Spent the winnings in the Wine bar with my brother and sister. My brother is here till Friday so there's a lot of entertaining to do till then. More fabulous updates soon!
Toodle pip.
Friday, 2 May 2008
yes! - it's another cancer update!
The news today is that my mum is to be moved into a nursing home/hospital called The Friary, in Richmond, North Yorkshire. This is because her treatment is still not working and they think a course of Radiotherapy would do no good. She is basically going there to die in more comfortable surroundings. Estimates are she would be doing well if she makes it to June, but that is unlikely. Still throwing up every day and Steroids not helping. What a way to end your life, sick every day for nearly two months (maybe three by the time she dies) and being unable to get out of bed or talk properly. Her brother is coming from Liverpool next week to visit, it will be the last time they ever see each other, what crappy circumstances. It will be great to see him but I doubt the chat will be cheerful. At least there is no hell or afterlife to fear - enjoy yourself now and hang the consequences! Toodle pip
Thursday, 1 May 2008
chelsea through to the final
So Chelsea got through to the final, fat Lamps blubbing, Shevshenko miss firing, Drogba diving, Ashley Cole cheating and whining, Terry pissing everywhere and Joe Cole wasted with them johnny come lately, bigging it up, celebrity west London wankers. We had better stuff them and win the league as well. Toodle pip
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