Booze, news and views from a drunken opinionated fool who can't spell very well, may well repeat himself, and can't blame it on dislexia
Monday, 3 October 2011
how to get rid of people using gravy
For some mad reason the FPO decided to invite the family round for lunch at the weekend, destroying my peace, quiet and happy home. I was even sent to the shops after finishing work to buy sausages (with firm instructions not to buy any cheap ones), cauliflower and booze. On returning home, I tried to watch 'The Sunday Supplement' before anyone turned up, but fell asleep on the settee within about 5 minutes, to be woken with Rook at the door, as a prelude to everyone else arriving. All was going swimmingly once everyone had settled down with a drink, as l was royally entertaining everyone while the FPO was in the kitchen, slaving away cooking (as she should). However, when it was food time, l poured the gravy onto everybodies plates. Where's the harm in this you may ask. Ah, there's the rub...when pouring it onto Louise's plate, little Lol put her hand in it and obviously got burned (slightly, as l have the reflexes of a mongoose and wiped it off). Lol was crying on and off after that (probably scared l was going to throw some more over her) and Louise and Dazzer took her home early, leaving us with Rook and Deb. Still, we then had a good night, watched 'Later' with Jools Holland, and all got drunk. I'll have to remember the gravy trick next time l want some solitude. Everyone has now been warned!
# Postscript - the baby is fine with no injuries, so don't bother calling Childline.